I don’t know about you, but the second trimester was my favourite time of my pregnancy even if it did come with more symptoms and pains.
The nausea had stopped which was a win! I was doing so much better with my graded exposure to be able to overcome parts of my agoraphobia. I was finally getting an obvious baby bump; I didn’t just look like I was getting chubbier. Finding out the gender was coming up as I’d booked a private scan to find out which was one of the best things I done. If I could have afforded it, I would have booked to have even more scans the further along I got so I could see him growing and changing.
Although I was enjoying it a lot more, I still had all the fears in the back of my head, I was terrified of going to midwife appointments and them telling me they can’t find a heartbeat. Or going into preterm labour. I would speak about my concerns and worries every time I saw my midwife or therapist as it was influencing my treatment plan. They would always rationalise with me and for that I am so grateful. It has always helped me to talk to a neutral person about the way I feel, strangers are easier to talk to. I don’t care if they judge me, I am only bothered about what my family think of me. I didn’t want them to see me as being weak, even though suffering with a mental illness doesn’t make anyone weak. That’s just the way I was feeling at the time, now I understand how strong we are! Mental illness is fucking hard and to admit it, to seek help and speak about it is the best step to take.
A lot of women wait for the 12 weeks and then announce it on Facebook I just didn’t want to, I didn’t feel ready, it was a though I didn’t want to jinx it by announcing too early. I waited until our private gender scan at 17 weeks and we then announced it on Facebook. Although most of our family and close friends knew. There were still people we haven’t told yet. Announcing the pregnancy was an odd feeling, I was so excited yet apprehensive about putting it out there. I’m so glad we waited to announce it until I was comfortable to do so. Finding out the gender was amazing, although most people were convinced, we were having a girl, so I began to think it was a girl too. I would constantly look at girls’ clothes, so when we found out it was a boy, I was so shocked! But so excited, I couldn’t wait to see who he would look like. Choosing a boy’s name was so hard though, picking a tiny humans name is a big deal.
I finally had my energy back, I felt more like myself again. But then I kept getting these pains all in my pelvis and I had that pregnancy waddle when the pains were bad. Due to my job I was constantly walking around, but I had to keep sitting down. *Queue managers getting pissed off* A few managers at work seemed to think I was just messing about I think, or that the pain wasn’t actually that bad, that it was all part of a normal pregnancy. But let me tell you pelvic girdle pain/ SPD is fucking killer. I felt like my hips were ripping in half, the pain would go down my leg sometimes as well. In the end I had to go to the doctors just to see if it was just part of pregnancy that everyone got or if it was something else that I could get treatment for. My SPD started quite early on in my pregnancy; think I was around 18 weeks.
Luckily, I got referred to see a physiotherapist, who was so lovely. She recommended exercises for me, and I’m pretty sure I sat on an exercise ball most of my pregnancy. She also put me in to have hydrotherapy, which was amazing! If you’re suffering with pelvic pain, I highly recommend it. It felt amazing being in the water, even though after I felt a little achy, I slept so much better at night after a session. I struggled all the way to the end with SPD, I just couldn’t cope going to work either as the pain was so bad. Even driving there and back, after getting a bunch of fit for work notes from the doctors and physio they gave me office duties. Doing this did help in the beginning but sitting down on the office chairs most of the day was making it worse as all the pressure was still on my hips from my bump. In the end I couldn’t do it anymore, I think I was around 31 weeks when I got signed off work until the end of my pregnancy. It was in my second trimester that I started using stretch mark lotion. Not because I was bothered about getting them, I just wanted to avoid having a really itchy stomach as my bump grew. Plus, I loved rubbing my bump as he would kick me and move as soon as I was done. I used Palmers cocoa butter lotion. It smelt so good and the whole bottled lasted until I was 38 weeks, I used it every evening before bed.
So as if having SPD wasn’t enough, in the second trimester I had to do more blood tests and my iron levels came back low. I was put on 3 iron tablets a day as soon as my results had come back. Let me be real a minute, the constipation you get from taking these tablets is a whole new adventure. In the beginning they made me feel sick again, but once I got used to that it was fine. I couldn’t get used to not being able to poop comfortably though, gross I know. I am aware a lot of woman have horrendous pregnancies but that doesn’t mean mine was easy. Especially with the damn heat we had this summer, I always wanted to be pregnant during the summer so I could wear cute dresses but fucking hell. It was like I was constantly in a sauna.
I think I was 19 weeks when I felt my first kick.
Feeling him move for the first time was indescribable, I couldn’t believe it. I could only feel him inside my stomach, we couldn’t feel him on the outside yet. But I’ll always cherish those couple of weeks of just me being able to feel him moving, it felt so much more love for him, it was like our bonding time. I don’t remember the exact week my husband finally felt him moving, but I do remember him freaking out. He was completely freaked out by it, which was hilarious to me. Especially as I got bigger and you could see the baby rolling around and stretching. Feeling and seeing my baby boy move in my tummy is what I miss the most about being pregnant. I loved it so much, even more so when he started reacting to my voice or music we played in the car. My husband and I love singing and dancing terribly in the car or kitchen whilst we clean. Now we get to do it with our baby boy, and he loves it, he’s definitely my baby as he loves the Christmas playlist, which is all I listen too currently!
The third trimester was a whole new ball game, kick counting, the waddle, heartburn, and baby practising their karate moves. xXx